Why do people say what they say?

Well yesterday I had someone ask me "how far along" I was.  It has been a long time since I have had that question.  I played it off with grace, but deep down it hurt.  It hurt real bad.  I think that this time it hurt so bad because I have been working so hard to loose weight and workout.  I struggle with my mid-section like a lot of women do. I have been doing a lot of ab exercises that help target my mid-section and I have increased my cardio and even included running again.  It hurt because most days I bust my butt for 2 hours either at the Gym OR with my Personal Trainer.  I know why I struggle.  I know its my diet, but I am getting that into check.  I am bound and determined to make myself healthy and fit.  I have goals.  I WILL meet those goals.  

After the lady at the bank proceeded to ask me if I was pregnant, she then continued, after I said I wasn't, to talk to me about body wraps and other weight loss things...never apologizing for the absolutely rude question she just asked me.  I just kept a smile on my face and proceeded to tell her I workout everyday and I take my health serious.  It was all I could do to not cry, because a little bit of my pride just went down the toilet. 

I got to thinking why people think that they have the right to say things that they know they should NEVER ask a woman?  I asked Jory last night if men think about those things before they speak, and his reply was "YES if we want to live to see tomorrow!"  I married a smart man.  I know not everyone has a filter on their mouths, and even I have said things that I shouldn't have.  I at least have been embarrassed and have apologized immediately for it.  I guess all I am trying to say is people think before you speak.  I am done with this now, I am no longer going to dwell on this, it is in the past.  I now have even more reason to work hard to reach my goals.  I WILL not let someone I don't even know bring me down! 

Remember When?

I was at the gym this morning on the elliptical machine overlooking the basketball court, where they have a kids class going from 9:30-10:30.  Kids that are Lily's age.  I tend to stick by those machines because it is fun to watch the kids play and interact with each other. I was almost done with my workout when I noticed a cute little old man probably in his 80's wearing a fedora looking down on the little kids playing and running.  He had the sweetest smile on his face as he watched those kids and I got to thinking, I wonder if HE remembers HIS kids at that age?

I was visiting another one of my besties this weekend up in Nebraska.  She just had her first son in January  and he was almost 6 weeks early.  This is her first child so naturally she is a nervous wreck.  I can so remember being in her shoes!  I remember coming home from the hospital thinking, "OH MY GOSH!!! WHAT DID I DO???"  They ( the people aka Doctors, Nurses) just gave me this baby to take home and raise?  What were they thinking!?!?!  I was SUCH a wreck!  My hormones were all out of whack I was tired, I was in pain...Oh my, and now I have to care for this child who doesn't come with an owners manual?  So YES I remember that stage oh so very well.  I think all of us mothers can remember back to that moment.  By the way she is an AWESOME mommy!  I enjoyed watching her care for her son with such love, even when she was exhausted.  She and her husband will be raising this beautiful child up in such a Godly loving home.  It was fun for me to see!

I got to thinking today while I saw that old man watch down on those kiddos, why did I wish for the NEXT stage so fast?  Looking back I think it was just because I wanted to see what else my children could do.  I gave my bestie some advice before I left her and I just told her to enjoy the moment that she is in.  The cuddles and cute scrunchie baby butt, the spit up and the cute little grunts will soon be just a memory, and SHE will be looking back and remembering when her little angel boy was doing those things.  I had a lot of memories come back to me this past weekend that were so great to have of my kids.  I wish that I would have slowed down a little bit when they were so itsy bitsy so I could have savored it a bit more, but alas, here I am with a 7 year old and an almost 5 year old.  

They grow too fast and I can remember when....       

A Fresh New Start...

Well folks, I have decided to start blogging again.  For the past year, I have felt like I have had nothing worth saying...

As a mom and wife I have found it hard to keep what is important in life in check.  This past weekend I had the incredible opportunity to go down to Tyler, TX for a Mom Life Mommy boot-camp with my Best Friend JP.  The trip was worth the drive and the weekend away from my family.  What is incredible was that when I asked Jory if I maybe would be able to go to this, he was so encouraging for me to DO SOMETHING for myself.  (I have an incredible husband that takes care of me) *anyways* This weekend was an eye opener in a lot of ways for me.
  
First off I was told TIME AND TIME AGAIN this weekend that "I AM the mother God intended for my children"  YES!!! YES!!! I am NOT screwing them up??  Well I guess not, God doesn't make mistakes...There are SO many times during the day, the week that I feel unworthy of being my childrens' Mommy.  I feel tired, cranky, mad, angry, did I mention tired?  There have been times I have just wanted to QUIT!  I don't want to make another PB&J, I don't want to pick up another toy, I DON'T want to clean the house, do another load of laundry...There are times I just want to sit on the couch and go Bababababababababababa, like Goldie Hawn in the movie Overboard.  You know what keeps me going?  It is the promise that my kids will be great!  I GET TO RAISE THEM!!!  I get to put my corkyness and my Dyisims in their little lives.  I am NOT screwing them up.  I am raising them to be Godly children!  I am raising them in a LOVED home where I have to learn to let the little things go.  Do more Hugs and kisses.  Less playing on the phone and more playing with chalk and Candyland and dancing to Frozen to the trillionth time in the kitchen.  I learned this weekend that it is the little things that my kids will remember.  

We took a personality test this past weekend as well.  If you know me then you know I LOVE LOVE LOVE personality tests.  They intrigue me.  They gave us this paper that we had to determine which trait best describes us.  There was Pink, Green, Blue and Orange.  I was a green.  Each color represented the personality.  
Pink= Perfect Mommy
Green= Strong Mommy
Orange= Popular Mommy
Blue= Peaceful Mommy  
I will share the link to the personalty test right here
 http://www.susanme.com/themomiam/

This is what it says about me:  Pretty spot on... I guess all in all I have learned to accept who I am and who I am as a mother.  Everything else God has in his hands.

Reflections

Reflections;

 

My heart is a heavy heart this morning.  I can't stop thinking about what is happening in our world today!  WHY must we kill each other?  When is it okay to be so pissed off at the world that we go out and kill people?  The answer is NEVER, it is never okay to take someone elses life because YOU are unhappy.  God says THOU SHALL NOT KILL!!!  I am sickened and upset that my children have to grow up in this kind of world.  There is nothing that the government or politicians can do to make this better, unless they turn to the God of mercy!  Until our country turns back to the beliefs that we used to have, things will NOT change.  I want to have the right to defend myself, and I want to have the knowledge that my children can be kids still, and not have to worry about what might happen if they go and see mommy run a race or go to the movies or wherever they may go...that is not to much to ask for right?  We live in a sick world where we broadcast the violence in the world and do not broadcast the good positive stuff.  That I believe just feeds the want for violence.  Is it sad that I can count one news story that is positive and uplifting when I watch the news?  Positive FEEDS positivity and Negative FEEDS negativity.  Simple concept right there...

 

The attacks yesterday were on a group of people who are not only physically strong but mentally strong. Runners are among the happiest people in the world.  They have so much energy and endorphins running through them!  Sick! 

 

I pray for the victims of the attacks yesterday and for all the other victims that have suffered from terrorism.  I pray for our enemies and their souls. I pray that their sick minds can and will be healed.  

 

God is the only way that we can be free of this legion.  We need to step up our trust in God and join with the angel armies and hold tight that our enemies WILL NOT DESTROY US, but make us stronger!          

Understanding the + vs -

WOW it has been a LONG long long time since I have blogged on the Super Woman blog...

How to start off...Well I guess that I should say that old saying of "I have good news and I have bad, which one do you want first" but instead I will begin with do you want the Positive first OR do you want the Negative?  Well the Negitive wins...

I have been so very hard on myself lately.  I can't seem to get it together.  I feel like I am failing at being a mother, wife and just plain ol Dyan.  I feel very sad, blue, I have no motivation whats so ever to do ANYTHING.  When someone asks how I am doing I reply, busy, tired, worn out, ect.  Who wants to hear that as a reply?  Very depressing.  Well it is the truth.  It seems like every winter I start to feel this way.  I guess it is all the time that I spend inside.  My vitamin D count must go way down because I start feeling depressed and no good to anyone. I am not feeling great about myself and I feel like eating, but then eating is where the problem stems from how I feel about myself.  It really is a vicious cycle and I know who is behind it.  So today in the tanning bed, that's right Vit D!  I just started praying to God to help me help myself.  I asked him to take away that desire to eat bad food and to really start helping me to put the craving energy into something else, like praying for those who surround me, who love me, who are there for me.  I asked Him to put someone's name in my head that I could pray for whenever I had a craving for something that I SHOULD not have.  I need to go back to the book Made to Crave and re-read it.  It seemed to help having another place to put my energy. I need to take care of myself so I can better take care of my family.  That is IT with the negative attitude!

Now I really debated whether I should bold in the Super Mom blog or if I should blog in the Journey to a New me blog, but this one won out.  So with every negative there needs to be a positive and this is why this blog won out.  

I am a second year deer hunter.  This year I got my first buck/deer.  It was a prefect day, My sister Meghan was able to come over in the early afternoon and watch the kids for me.  She picked up Christian from school so I could go out.  Jory was at work and so I went out by myself.  I got into my tree around 1:15pm.  I sat and sat...I almost fell out of the tree when a squirrel jumped into the tree right next to me and about scarred me to death.  So after I recovered from my near heart attack, I was just sitting and listing to the peace and quiet when I heard it...I heard the scraping of a buck's rack against a tree.  I looked and looked all around in front of me, and I could not find him.  I thought to myself that he might be behind me. and low and behold there he was.  Two trees behind me.  Now there was two things that could have happened.  One was that he could have started walking away from me, OR he could turn and start walking RIGHT under me!  Well his decision was made and he walked right under me.  Well there were too many trees in the way, so I had to wait until he was in the clearing and that is when I shot him.  It was a perfect shot from about 40yards.  He ran about 20 yards and was down.  I will tell you it was an amazing adrenalin rush for me.  I was so proud of myself that I did it on my own.  PLUS it was a 10 point buck.  I will probably never shoot another one that large again.  That is ok.  I was really worried that Jory would be upset that this year he did not get anything.  I was worried of him being jealous of me.  He was so very encouraging and he started bragging on me.  He was SO proud of me, that I was willing to go out on my own and hunt AND get my first deer was so cool to him that jealousy never even crossed his mind!  I have the coolest hubby in the world! 

My kids are growing growing growing!  Christian is in kindergarten now and Lily and I have most of the day just her and I!  I am loving this time with my girl.  I am still working just two days a week and it seems to be working out great for me and for my family.  We started a new tradition in the house this Christmas...We have adopted an Elf.  His name is Zingo and he is an ornery little guy.  It is really fun to see Christian wake up every morning and try and find what Zingo has been up to.  It has really helped with the attitudes of my children.  They know that every evening after they go to bed, Zingo flies up to Santa to give him the report of them being good or bad.  So far, So good!  That is all positive and I know that I have a great life and a GREAT hubby and GREAT children. 

So here is what I know to be true.  I know that I am a child of God, My husband adores me, I love my kids and they are growing to fast, I know that I am worth the time to take care of myself and that I need to love myself enough to let the little things in this life go.  I know that I have awesome great friends who love me for who I am.  There should be nothing now to bring my mood down.  Now that I KNOW these things to be true.  I still could use prayers to help me get out of the "funk" that I am in.  I will be praying for you all often.  Thanks for reading!

 

  

 

Mothers Day and all the Joys...

We had a really great last weekend.

It was my first time getting to ride/drive my new boat! OH MY GOODNESS, it was WONDERFUL! I LOVE IT!!! We were able to get down to the lake in the afternoon on Friday last week. We made a quick run on the lake that night, and we got out again Saturday afternoon. Christian broke in the new swim platform by jumping in the water! Oh my, he said it was REALLY cold! The kids will love it when it gets warmer. We saw Adam and Paula and baby Lydia. We saw both of their parents this past weekend too! It was nice seeing everyone.

We came home Saturday night, so I could take care of nursery duties on Sunday morning. It was graduation for NTS, and we had visitors. After I took care of some stuff, we left early and went to the Royals game. I got a free Royals tote bag, and a sunburn. It was good to get out and enjoy the weather and watch a baseball game. Fun times were had by all!

After the game we headed home and had my family over for dinner. Brats and Hotdogs. It was god to relax and let Jory take care of the grilling! I love my family!

Jory and the kids got me a Kindle for Mothers Day! I LOVE it! I love reading, but to carry books back and forth to the lake and places I go, is just a pain. This is nice cause I can throw it in my purse and go! I have a TON of books on my wish list already! Cannot wait to read them.

I love being a Mom! I have had a great example. My Mom has always been there for me and I love her so! She is one of my best friends and I am glad we have the relationship that we have. She has given me great advice and she LOVES being a grandmother. Thanks Mom for being there always. I know that it is a bittersweet day for my mom, cause my grandma passed away almost 10 years ago after a battle with Breast cancer. I know that she missed her, but she is loved.

Well that's all I have today. Summer pictures will be coming....

The Good Guy Wins!?!

As I am sitting here listening to the Today show, I wonder just how many families are feeling justice today, the morning after finding out that one of the worst terrorist was finally found and killed? Osama Bin Laden was responsible for the murders of thousands Americans! He was a sick man.
I will always remember where I was on 911. I just remember having that horrible stomach pain when watching those towers go down and seeing the Pentagon crashed into, and hearing that another plane was headed towards the White House, and then crashed because brave Americans stood up against evil.
I just listened to this family on the Today show talk about their daughter who was in one of the Trade Towers on the horrible day. They said they talked to her right after the first plane crashed into her building. They said that she was scarred and she was hot. I COULD NOT imagine talking to one of my kids and knowing that they would not survive and telling them to stay calm. As a mother, knowing that you could not protect your child, hurts my heart.
10 years later, I still morn for those who were lost. I did not know anyone personally who was killed on that day, but I feel as a human that those people were my brothers and sisters. I wonder how many people repented their sins that day and were won to God? I can't help but wonder.
So as I reflect the events that happened 10 years ago, I want to know if the good guy won? I know that the job is not over and we should never let down our guard. I know that there is plenty of evil in this world and we would be dumb to let our ego get in the way of security. I still think that we have a road ahead of us. Maybe we will never be rid of terrorism in our world, but I guess we just have to pray that our Lord will protect us.